Things I've learnt about the French...

So this week saw the start of the mammoth French February holidays which also tied in with Engish Half Term. Thankfully it's not been as busy on the slopes as everyone made out it would be but then maybe we know where to go to avoid the masses. We have a lovely French family staying in the chalet who basically don't want us around other than to make breakfast, clean the cooker and take them places! So it's been a pretty easy work week and I'm very grateful for that as I'm currently stuffed full of a stinky cold and rivalling Rudolph for his job next Christmas!

So things I've learnt about the French:

1 - When on holiday (even a ski holiday) the French do not get up early! Whilst the majority of our guests have been British and very keen to get up and off in the morning to get the best snow of the day, the French couldn't care less what time they make it to the slopes. We've been doing breakfast at 9am (very loosely) with a lift to the slopes at 1015! Craziness!! I did however take advantage of this and took some time to teach the children how make Coke/Mento fountains!

2 - The French know how to make a right royal mess of your cooker! Every morning I have cleaned my cooker and washed the entire contents of the pan cupboard that has made it into the sink. I don't know what they cook but they use a lot of olive oil (I use 1 bottle in 3 weeks - they've used 3 bottles in 1 week!) and make a huge mess in the kitchen.

3 - They cook enough for an army and eat enough for a bunch of mice! Every morning the remnants of the night before's dinner has been left on the hob. This morning, for example, there was enough pasta and salmon for 10, a pressure cooker full of something (I don't know what because I couldn't work out how to open it!) and a large pan of rice from 3 days ago!

4 - The French are terrible and very impatient drivers! Now, whilst I already knew this, today it has been reaffirmed. Whilst waiting for the bus (the safest mode of transport at the moment), a car stopped on the roundabout to pick up an elderly passenger. There was a bit of a faff with which side she should get in and then the door was locked but after roughly 30 seconds she was sorted. Within this time 5 cars were continuously honking their horns at the rudeness of the said car for stopping in their way, shouting out of windows and then some decided to bypass the problem by driving over the roundabout!

When it snows, they also struggle with which side of the road they should drive on and whilst they know it's the right, there's no white line, which obviously causes them much confusion as well as a temporary loss of memory resulting in other road users having to drive precariously close to the edge of the mountain side and constantly getting wingmirrors bashed!

5 - The French can't swim in straight lines! I've taken to swimming at the local sports centre and it's usually a relaxing hour where I can swim at my own pace up and down the lane. Occasionally I have to share, and that's fine as I am polite and let the faster swimmers through. Some seem to think they can fit between two swimmers already passing each other (surprisingly they don't fit!) and some just attempt to swim over the top of you! I particularly enjoy having my feet tickled and water thrown in my face by very 'splashy' swimmers! Today I tried the wider slower lane but that backfired when two young boys who thought they were better than they are got in and proceeded to swim under, over and alongside everyone else. They didin't understand the swim on the right rule and may have had a helping 'push' from several people!

6 - The French Ski like crazy people! There's no accounting for bravado in France. If you say you can and talk the talk then you better get down that hill as fast as you say you can no matter what the conditions, who gets in your way and never mind that you can't stop! Yesterday was rather icy and slippy in places so I was skiing within my not-so-comfortable zone at the edge of the pistes in the softer stuff with crazy Frenchies whizzing past definitely not in control!

7 - The French do not queue. Whether it's in a bakery, at a bus stop, at the ski lifts or in the supermarket, there's no such thing as a queue and the only way to get yourself seen, heard or a seat is with your elbows out and an ability to see that you are the only person there that matters learned directly from the French. Goodbye manners, British politeness and 'after you'!

8 - They know how to make pastries! It's not all bad and after most activities I do enjoy a little trip to the bakery. I believe that so far in Megeve I have sampled at least 4 different patisseries and boulangeries but, believe me, there are many more! My particular favourite is a Croix de Savoie - a delicious bricohe based cross with custard inside the arms of the cross and icing sugar liberally sprinkled over the top. I also like Torsade Chocolat - a brioche twist with custard and chocolate chips and today I tried something I've never seen before, can't remember it's name but it was delicious - a croissant style flaky pastry with custard and berries. There are many more delicious things in a French bakery like Flan, Croissant Amande, Brioche sucre, and all the cakes that Phil likes! I could tell you about each one individually but it may get a little boring for you...

All of this said, I love to be in France and actually a trip back to the UK reminds me that people in the UK are no longer how I thought they were. So for now I'll stick with my Frenchies, with their stinky cheese, love of garlic and lack of manners and enjoy working my way through Megeve's bakeries in my little snow globe!

Love is in the Air in an Eventful Week!

It may be some time since I last posted a blog but I'm going to make up for it with a very eventful week! We'll start at the beginning with some more corporate skiing. We left the chalet heading for Mont d'Arbois with 7 guests. This may not sound particularly challenging but when they're hanging out of their arses (for want of a better phrase) it's a challenge! To add to it we were also experiencing the heaviest snow of the season so far - so much in fact it was sticking quicker than the ploughs could clear it and we were skiing in about 6 inches of fresh snow on each run! We enjoyed the blue and red Princesse runs with a trip in a dry telecabine at the end of each run and then it was time for coffee so we skiied all the way back to the bottom of Mont d'Arbois and enjoyed an hour in the warmth of the Club Mont d'Arbois. We did have to de-snow before we went in but luckily the radiators were pumping out hot air and my gloves dried whilst I enjoyed a hot chocolate.

It was a little bit windy as well so when we first started skiing our route to lunch at L'Alpette was not open but by some stroke of luck by lunchtime it was open and we took the lift across, skied to the chairlift and quickly lost three to the warmth of the restaurant! The more hardy of us skiied a red run and then a black run - properly earning our lunch - before heading in to enjoy copious amounts of Savoie wine and food! Needless to say after lunch we skiied one run and retired to the chalet!

Our next guests arrived, a group of 5 gentlemen with a penchant for red wine, and a couple who spend a lot of time in Megeve with Ski Royale. We guided the gentlemen for two days and were rewarded with one gentleman declaring it was one of the best days of his life! Sadly on the second day one gentleman took a couple of big tumbles and the second one resulted in a lift down the mountain on a back-board sledge. Luckily he was ok, although not happy he missed out on lunch at the Forestier.

We're now back onto corporate skiing and whilst rather well behaved on their first night, last night was much bigger and this morning's guiding was a challenge. Add into the mix the heavy snow and it's not surprising we didn't start skiing til 1030 and stopped for lunch at 1230! Phil and I enjoyed lunch at Le Face au Mont Blanc very much but I think the others were struggling slightly! I enjoyed the salad buffet and soup followed by the dessert buffet and Phil had some salad, chicken and chips and then destroyed the dessert buffet! Needless to say there was no more skiing and the only things happening this afternoon are hot tubs, football watching and sleeping!

I hope you all had a lovely Valentine's day whatever you got up to. We were very lucky and had the day off so we had a lie in, a late breakfast, a box of Ferrero Rocher, went for a swim and then went for pizza in the evening. Whilst we might not have had the most romantic night, from what I can gather, there was plenty of romance on the cards for other members of Ski Royale with a hot date in the Wake-Up bar and a market-fresh meal for one lucky lady!

We've got a busy couple of weeks with a French family for half term and another family with twin 4 year olds after that! Then we're into March and the season of family visits. I've been checking out things to do with my niece and nephew and at the moment, if they're being a little bit trying, the threat is no horse sleigh ride! There are plenty of horses to choose from - I just hope they choose the right one!

Chalet Girl Swear Words Number 3: 'In the chalet last year I...'

This week we have three lovely ladies staying in the top rooms and 4 men staying, three of which seem pretty normal and pleasant but one of which seems dead set on telling us indirectly all about the things he's done in previous chalets he's visited to annoy the chalet hosts! If there's one thing you probably shouldn't tell the people looking after you, cleaning your room and cooking your meals it's probably how you 'searched through every cupboard looking for the red wine'! When you've had your allocated wine and some more on top of everyone else's then it's probably time to stop drinking or pay up! At least he hasn't been through the fridge and helped himself to tomorrow's dinner!

Yesterday we had a lovely ski with our guests. Phil went off with Martin the ski guide and the men and I went with our ladies and a few other people from the hotel and Michelle down some blue runs. I enjoyed my gentle ski, practising my small turns and trying to get to grips with a 360 flat spin but somewhere along the way I get stuck facing up the hill! The visibility wasn't very good at the top of the hills and skiing to coffee was like skiing into the unknown - luckily I know that part of the piste well! By lunchtime the clouds were starting to clear out which meant the guests had a fab afternoon on the slopes.

I received a parcel in the post this week from my Auntie who, having read my blog, decided I needed some fur and sent me a fabulous headband/earwarmer from Jack Wills. I have to say I now fit in perfectly in Megeve and it's also very warm and hides a bad hair day amazingly!

I've also been chatting on Skype with my nephew and niece who are paying us a short visit in March. They've seen their room, argued over who gets the big bed (although I have a feeling Daddy will have that bed!), seen the hot tub, the swings, the sledges, my skis, the snow... I also told them they'd have to make a cake for the ski shop so they can get skis and Maurice told me he needs to make a big cake in order to get big skis!! Good 4-year-old logic if you ask me! We're also going to go on a horse sleigh ride which caused rather a lot of excitement! Here's Beatrix in her new ski suit - can you guess what colour is her favourite?!

Today we're not skiing. Instead we walked down the Calvaire Way, a 19th Century walk,  into Megeve to write some postcards and drop off a lamb shank for Charlie in the hotel. We had a lovely walk down past the small churches, chapels and other buildings, stopped for coffee whilst we wrote the postcards and what a difference 30 minutes makes!

We looked outside and it was snowing, not just a few flakes but proper snow! We walked over to the bakery for a tarte citron meringue and a croix de Savoie, posted our postcards and made our way to the bus stop, abandoning our plan of walking back up the Calvaire walk.

I looked something like a snowman by the time we got back to the chalet but it's all good because it means that tomorrow we have all morning to ski on new snow! I'm also going to watch some amazing mogul skiing (skiing over very tight bumps with a few jumps added in just for fun!). We have a changeover tomorrow with 2 guests arriving for dinner and 5 more at midnight. We're then guiding them on Friday with a lot of others joining the group before stopping for lunch at the Alpette. It could be interesting trying not to lose anyone, if we find them all to begin with, as the forecast is currently for heavy snow all morning!

We then have a day off on Saturday when the forecast is better and are very much looking forward to it!